As many guys will know or soon learn if they are visiting Magaluf for the first time, the toilet attendants at the various bars and clubs have a list of sayings. Some of these will have you cringing and others take concentration not to laugh so hard you mess up your shoes.

Here is a quick run-down of the infamous sayings from the various toilet attendants across Magaluf in no particular order…

• No splash, no gash
• No spray, no lay
• No Armani, no punani
• Wash your fingers for the mingers
• No Armani Code ya dont shoot the load
• No Cologne ya go home alone
• Clean your toes for the hoes
• No soap, no hope
• No tissue, no issue

And last but by no means least…

To the tune of ‘london bridge is falling down…
“Freshen up for de punani, punani, punani; freshen up for de punani; we love p u s s y”

Please feel free to let us know of any sayings you think are worthy here.